


Better Shop Around

by ScarletCorvid



Category: House M.D.
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-11-12
Updated: 2017-11-12
Packaged: 2019-02-01 12:51:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,161
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12705357
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ScarletCorvid/pseuds/ScarletCorvid
Summary: Wilson isn't so sure taking House grocery shopping is a good idea, but he doesn't seem to have a choice.





	Better Shop Around

**Author's Note:**

> Written to fill the prompt 'Why do you have ten cans of Easy Cheese in your cart?' at Prompted Quill.

They had decided to live together nearly a month ago, and Wilson had been trying to postpone this moment long as possible. He wanted them to be a couple and to grow old together, but domestic bliss wasn't easily gotten with someone like House. For the most part all of the cooking and cleaning had been his job and that was fine. It was much easier to do it himself. But today House decided they were going into uncharted terriotory and there was nothing Wilson could do to dissuade him.

They were going to the grocery store. 

"How very type A of you," House commented over Wilson's shoulder as he rolled out his shopping list.

"Well, I just want to make sure I get everything we need." He explained patiently, selecting a cart then taking a sanitary wipe out of a little packet in his pocket to run over the handle. House rolled his eyes at the practice. For the most part, he found Wilson's war on germs during cold and flu season annoying and a tad too obsessive compulsive for his tastes. 

"You can get what you need." He decreed grandly, grabbing his own cart. "I'll get what I need." 

"Oh...kay." Wilson said skeptically, picturing a cart filled with peanut butter, jelly, and canned soups. He'd been making an effort to get them both to eat healtheir. After all, neither of them where getting any younger. And he wanted House around to bitch and whine for many years to come. Letting him loose in the grocery store seemed to be the complete antithesis of this idea. 

"I'll meet you in front?" House asked causually, hooking his cane over the handle of the cart. 

"Um...sure." He nodded in return. "I'll be in the produce isle..." 

"I don't need a babysitter." The other man countered gruffly and began to limp off into the opposite direction, able to move surprisingly fast with the aid of the cart. 

After a moment he turned the cart around again to head back into Wilson's direction. He put the bad leg up on the rack underneath the basket, looked over his shoulder to make sure no one was around and launched himself off with his good left leg. As he whizzed past his partner he gave a little wave, a big smirk across his face. 

Wilson watched with mild horror as House disappeared around the corner and fought the urge to go chasing after him. If he crashed into something and cracked his head open, he deserved it. Of course a gulity conscious followed him to the produce department and while he started to thump meleons he was really worrying about his partner. He was annoying as hell, but he loved House with every bit of his being. 

"Clean up, Aisele Nine." A voice crackled across the intercom, jolting him out of his revierie. 

No, it couldn't be...

"Bob," The intercom crackled again. "We're going to need a hand on aisle nine. At least two people."

'Oh dear God please do not let that be who I think it is...' Wilson prayed silently, his eyes closed tightly. A moment later he felt an impact shake the entire cart and his eyes snapped open to see whom he'd run over, though he didn't think he had been moving. House smirked at him over the handle bars of his own cart. He'd run into Wilson's head on. 

"House..." Wilson opened his mouth to ask if he'd been on aisle nine, but as he surveyed the contents of his partner's cart another question came out. "Why do you have ten cans of Easy Cheese in your cart?"

"'Cause it's easy." House replied, looking at Wilson like he was a moron. "And it's cheese. Need I say more?" 

"It's also full of fats and all other sorts of crap." Wilson frowned. "At least put the other nine back."

"No." House shook his head. "You never said moving in together meant you were going to control my easy cheese portions." 

"Oh for God's...." Wilson started to huff, forcing himself to stop with a heavy sigh. He rubbed his forehead and felt the eyes of the other shoppers on them. He didn't want to make a scene, especially when he was just starting to get used to people out and about recognizing them as a couple. House, of course, could care less about making a scene and was just standing there with fake innocence on his face. 

"It's got a million uses." He added. "Practically a kitchen staple." 

"This from a man who thinks making a peanut butter and jelly sandwhich counts as cooking." 

"It takes skill to get the peanut butter to jelly ratio right." 

"Right," Wilson scoffed, rolling his eyes.

"Just trust me." House's blue eyes were devilish, though he was giving the puppy dog face he knew damn well Wilson couldn't resist.

"Oh fine!" He finally gave in and threw his hands up in the air. "At least it doesn't spoil." 

"Exactly." House replied in return, looking fully vindicated.

Wilson turned his attention to the lettuce to hide the little smile on his lips. Sometimes he could be so adorable he didn't know what to do with him. It was definetly one of those moments. At least, until he glanced over his shoulder and saw House making lewd gestures with a cucumber. A blush creeped up Wilson's neck as he turned away again and kept his eyes on the tomatoes until the said offensive vegetable was tossed into the cart. He didn't have to look at House's face to know he was grinning like the cheshire cat. 

Rolling his eyes, he pushed his cart towards the bread department. He could hear House following behind him and made a point to take two steps to the right so he didn't get his heels smashed. Wilson didn't have to worry, though, because House had already found something else interesting and his cart was drifting diagonally across the aisle. 

"Oooh, free food." 

Wilson paused on the other side of the aisle in time to see House stop at the table of a young woman offering samples of cheese from the deli. The platter looked like a flat porcupine, a toothpick sticking out of each cube and reaching towards the florescent lights. House, of course, was drawn to it like a moth to a flame.

"Wanna try our new deli cheddar or swiss?" The overly perky clerk smiled at House. 

"Don't mind if I do." House replied, taking the entire plate and heading back to his cart. The girl watched him with wide eyes, too surprised to say anything about his rude actions. Wilson was unsure how to react too. House steered his cart one handedly to stop beside him. 

Sometimes it seemed like House specialized in making people speechless.

"You know, we oughta do this more often." House said through a mouthful of cheese, offering the plate to Wilson. "Cheese cube?"


End file.
